Art

My life ride is a lot like an enclosed water-slide; it has a beginning and an end, it’s fast, dark at times, fun, scary, and can feel tight and enclosed.

A couple of years ago I road a two-story high, enclosed water-slide. To get to the slide I had to climb a steep, soggy, wooden staircase until I reached the top. Once I got to the top, I took one look at the slide’s entrance and thought...That’s not a slide. That’s a gerbil tube. I climbed up 7,000 moist stairs for a rodent ride.

The slide was completely enclosed from top to bottom. A person could lodge themselves in there like a blood clot and never come out!

The first few moments of the ride were intense. I couldn’t see my own hands in front of my face, although I did get used to the deep darkness after a few seconds. The only thing I couldn’t make peace with was the confinement.

People are always saying “life is short!” but never “life is tight!” Except it is tight. Every morning I wake up and crawl into my enclosed water-slide, cross my fingers and hope that I don’t run into any obstructions that day. But, then a week or so ago, I had an Oprah ah-ha moment and realized that yes life is short but not necessarily tight. I can ride over rivets and bump into obstacles and just bounce around them. Up, down to the sides. It’s wide open.

This new masthead, for this new year, is an ode to my new outlook. It’s wide and open and offers a different perspective. The size of Heidi in relation to the Earth, the vastness of space. Plus, the minute I took this picture I knew I wanted to Photoshop a globe into Heidi’s hand.

A whole new outlook on life PLUS an excuse to do cool stuff in Photoshop. Isn’t it nice when you can put your new existential thoughts to practical use?

• Why can't someone fix the holidays? Why, I ask you?

• A generation of women standing in front of mirrors, holding up phones, snapping shots of ourselves to upload to Facebook.

So about a year ago, I started posting these 'before and after,' masthead photos and, honestly, there have been months when I've asked myself why I keep shouting out to the world: "World, look at the suck photos I take!" 

And then I imagine The World saying: "Shut-up, The World doesn't care about your photos. The World just wants you to stop posting cat videos."

Unlike all the previous December/Holiday mastheads I've designed for this website before, this December's masthead only includes Heidi, and not both Heidi and Whitney. Between Whitney's full-day kindergarten schedule and the fact that any natural light I'd use to photograph Whitney has disappeared by the 5 o'clock news, I just couldn't find enough daylight hours to get a proper shot of her.

Currently, Heidi is still at home with me, but by this time next year she'll be in school too and then I won't have any models for the Holiday Masthead! And then I'll be forced to use a photo of yours truly and one I'll probably end up taking of myself, with a phone, in our bathroom mirror. And, this is fine, since for most of us moms and/or wives, it's really the only photos we have of ourselves. We're a generation of women standing in front of mirrors, holding up phones, snapping shots of ourselves to upload to Facebook. Years from now, our children will show their children photos of their grandmothers; a bunch of women looking blankly, in mirrors, with phones in their hands.

"See, Junior, that's grandma's profile picture when I was born!"

Meredith, quit it already...the 2012 Holiday Masthead isn't for another 12 months! I can only take one holiday season at a time. In fact, lately, I can only take one hour at a time since I heard the first Christmas carol on the radio. When was that again, August?

Ever since then, I've just wanted to press the fast forward button on this holiday season until I get to the part where its 2012. 2011 is already feeling so 2011! I'm ready for 2012; ready to set 2011 on the cliff's edge, place my pointer finger on its sternum and gently nudge it into history.

Goodbyyyyyye....2011!

Or maybe it isn't 2011 at all? Maybe it really is just the holidays. I hadn't wanted to go down this bah-humbug-road so soon, but I'm already over this most wonderful time of the year. I'm already feeling like the holidays are kicking my psyche in the groin. It's like, all year long, I'm balancing a refrigerator on my shoulders, all while navigating my way through a living-room-Lego-minefield, when the holidays come jumping on my back and are all: "Lets play horsey!"

All I can say is that these holidays had better watch their backs or I might just take a suck photo of them. That's right Joyous Season, don't screw with me!

2010 Holiday Banner (click image to enlarge)

2010 Holiday Banner (click image to enlarge)

The way in which each piece of a family falls into each other is the most intricate, complex puzzle imagined yet. ...Continue Reading »

Any success I’ve had photographing my kids can be attributed to the fact that I take a lot, A LOT, of shots. It’s really key. And now that everything is digital, I can freely shoot to my little heart’s content because I don’t have to worry about reloading film or paying for developing.

Plus, when I’m finished shooting, I can just delete all the closed eyes, back-of-the-head shots. Or, I can do what I normally do and hoard every photo I’ve ever taken. I wish I were kidding.

Seriously, whenever I upload photos to my online storage, I swear the server rolls its eyes. Just like Ben does when we’re leaving on a trip and he sees the number of suitcases I’ve packed. I mean, what? Don’t roll your eyes! Who KNOWS what I’ll feel like wearing in four days. Does that make me a bad person?

Fine, I’m a terrible human being, whatever, moving on. ...Continue Reading »