Somewhere around the third grade, dodge ball was introduced into our phy-ed curriculum. A game invented by Satan's minions while suffering from red wine hangovers during their periods. Basically, it's sanctioned beating under the guise of physical education.
Anyway, I'm not going to get into the rules of the game, or how whipping the red gym ball at our classmates' necks was considered "good game strategy," just know that it was a demoralizing, painful experience.
To get the game started, our gym teacher would choose two team captains, who in turn would choose the team players. The captains would select the most athletic kids first…Josh, Andy, Kevin, Matt...Then, it basically ran amuck into a popularity contest until the only two kids left were the fat kid, and the other fat kid. Seriously, those eight year old team captains, drunk with power, couldn’t even be bothered to choose either of the leftovers! Our gym teacher would finally assign those two to a team. NO ONE EVER PICKED THEM!
I like to think those two dodge ball leftovers grew-up, became successful somebody's, and now employ those team captions. And if there is any justice in this world, their job duties include foot rubs and strapping slabs of meat to their pants while cleaning-up the backyards of hungry pit-bulls.
Alright, so we’ve reached the part where I grab the wheel and take a sharp right corner into shameless self-promotion; veering dangerously close to neediness. Not the kind of neediness that wants to spend EVERY NIGHT with you, more like the kind that calls every few hours just to see what you‘re doing.
Anyway, I’m getting to the point now. Recently I was nominated to Babble’s Top Bloggers of 2009. Which is great. Even better? EVEN BETTER is that people are actually voting for me!
And wow Internet, you’re amazing. You’ve given me online grocery shopping, porn and now this. Now I can relive that anxious feeling I had while waiting to hear my name called for a dodge ball team. All from the comfort of my desk chair! A virtual online popularity contest. Except this time I’m wearing a bra and, I‘m fairly sure, I won‘t have to ice down any forearm welts.
I know it shouldn’t matter, win or lose. Right? For real, it’s not important. BUUUUT…well I’m human…so I’m innately needy, and a little hungry for some God. Damn. Validation. every now and then…and bacon.
So, if you read this blog [and I AM SO HUMBLED THAT YOU DO!], and would like to make me feel all warm and velvety [Modern Family reference], you can wander over to Babble and click the little thumbs-up icon next to BuenoBaby - up to one time per day.
And in return I’ll give you virtual hugs! Here’s one now…HUGS!
