Not a craft blog

It’s 9 a.m. This means I have approximately too many more hours ahead of me with little more to do with the kids than capping errant markers with mismatched marker caps. Sure, there’s always Chutes and Ladders [better known around these parts as Shoot Me in the Head and Ladders], but I have a mind I’m hoping to keep sane THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

We do own glitter and glue, but those kinds of hardcore crafts are best left closer to cocktail hour when the craft facilitator [me] can sip on a glass of wine as she watches tablespoons of glitter embed themselves into the counter-top grout.

Now it’s 9:10 a.m. I’ve checked my email and toasted a box of frozen waffles. Whitney and Heidi have already blown through their daily allowance of “screen time,” and I’ve got nothing! So I decided we should paint our nails.

I should write a parenting book or something.

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